Practical Alternatives to Plastic Surgery

This lady hits 60 and starts to feel a bit down as all her bodily parts are starting to sag a bit. She goes to see a plastic surgeon and asks if she can have a bit of a lift and tuck, not too much, just take 5-10 optical years off her body.

The surgeon explains that it’s really minor surgery she is asking for and she should rather explore some practical alternatives to surgery and avoid the possible risks and side effects that go along with it. He suggests she take a prune pip and fold it into the back of her scalp so as to collectively gather the skin around her body. That way, he explains each day she feels low, she can just turn it a bit and lift everything around her body, evenly. She can hide the ever increasing knot of skin under a bun or hairpiece, too.

She goes with this…

Three months later, this lady returns to the surgeons office, angry as a bag of snakes.

“I don’t know what you set me up for,” she says loudly, ” look at the size of these bags under my eyes!”

“My dear,” says the surgeon “you’ve overdone it, those aren’t bags under your eyes. They’re your breasts!”

“Well,” she quips, ” that explains my goatee.”

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