Three Friends Die and Go To Heaven

Three friends die and go to heaven. When they reach the Pearly Gates, St. Peter greets them, giving them the usual spiel that everyone gets when they’re about to enter, and as they are walking in he says ” By the way, I almost forgot the new rule. Whatever you do, don’t step on a duck.” The three friends think this is an odd rule, but they agree to it and step in.

The second they enter they realize that the final rule might be harder to follow than they thought. Heaven is TEEMING with ducks! Try as they might, they quickly realize that avoiding the birds is going to be a difficult task. And then it happens, “QUACK!” Friends Two and Three look over in shock as Friend One steps on a duck. Quickly, an angel rushes over with one of the most unattractive people the three of them have ever seen. “Because you stepped on a duck, you are condemned to spend the rest of your time in the Kingdom shackled to this person. Have a good eternity.” The angel shackles the two together and flies off.

After seeing what happened to Friend One, the other two are more wary of the consequences and begin treading extremely lightly. The two of them make it another three days before, on the dawn of the fourth day, a loud “QUACK” is heard. Friend Two looks to Friend Three, wide-eyed, fearing the worst. The angel rushes over, ties Friend Two to a hideous being, and flies away.

The third friend, now petrified that this will be his fate, becomes incredibly paranoid, barely walking anywhere. He lasts one week, two weeks, but on the beginning of the third week, an angel brings one of the most stunningly beautiful people the friend has ever seen, shackles the two of them together, and flies off. Bewildered and excited, Friend Three proclaims, “Wow! What did I do to deserve this?” And the person the friend is shackled to turns and replies “I don’t know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!”

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